In this 6 part series we will look at each of the parts of a Thriving Relationship to illuminate when a person should get divorced. If you haven’t worked to add in the components of a healthy relationship, then you will never know if your marriage could have been awesome, supportive, and connected!
Let’s look at what it takes to give your marriage a chance. Before you can say with confidence that this marriage was past the point of no return, you must do your due diligence. (This article is written for women as the majority of divorces in the United States are filed by women.)
Our Relationship Model
Remember, first you must work on yourself. This is true for everyone. Our model begins with the first three individual steps being Integrity, 100% Ownership, Blank Slate. These are the individual areas of work needed to grow a healthy relationship.
The next steps begin to create partnership. These include Getting Another’s World, and Creation.
Our relationship model gives you a path to follow to personal power, clarity, connection to self and then connection to your partner. Through following this model you will have the opportunity to build a life you both love. Each step is needed if you want to know with confidence that your marriage is impossible to turn around. You can then walk lovingly away, knowing you are giving your soon to be ex-spouse a better life without you.
To be clear, following our relationship model can help you discover what you actually want, and you will be empowered to stay with your spouse, or choose to complete that relationship.
Before you can work on your inner self, you must provide yourself safety. Your brain simply cannot and will not allow you to work on building up your integrity, for example, if you don’t think your kids will have something to eat tomorrow. If you are not safe, stop the action of your life immediately. Draw a line in the sand. Do something drastic. Move to a women’s shelter. File a police report. Call the food bank. In Utah, dial 2-1-1 for community resources. Get the basics of life handled first. Then you can begin the journey of building a healthy relationship.
Taking bold action to provide yourself safety communicates to your brain that you are, in reality, powerful! It also tells your brain that you matter. Finally, after basic necessities are handled, you can begin looking in the mirror more effectively, and you can see where you need to do work that only you can do.
Commit to yourself TODAY what you are going to handle, face, or deal with in reality, so that your brain has the space to begin growing and healing. Write down in your calendar what action(s) you need to take to get basic life needs met. Get intentionally busy taking actions, and make sure to subscribe so you can follow along and be supported as you make your choice for what’s best for you and your relationship, and your family.
By the end of this series, we will have 5 more posts that review a variety of topics that are important to explore as you make your choice.
- Start with Integrity – Setting Boundaries, Getting Clear on Your Needs and Wants
- 100% Ownership – Self-Acceptance, Clarity on Circumstances & Hardships
- Blank Slate – Releasing Pain from the Past, Forgiving Yourself, Forgiving Others
- Getting Another’s World – Understanding The Ways We Communicate
- Creation – Communicating New Needs and Wants, Create a Shift in Your Relationship
- How to Know When It’s Really Time for Divorce
Schedule a consultation with one of our coaches NOW if you want support in working out what you need for yourself to get your relationship, marriage, and life in order.
Our goal is to really empower you to discover what it is that you actually need and want in your relationship, and what it will take for you to have that in your current relationship, or to clean up life so that you can divorce in a way that empowers you for your next relationship to be healthy, happy, and thriving.
Our coaching programs have been created to empower those who are struggling in their relationships, because they don’t have the love, connection, and trust they want.
If you are interested in learning more about our coaching program, you can join us for our monthly FREE coaching session, find more details here.
You can also schedule a consultation with Elizabeth to make a unique plan for your life to support you in creating a life you love and want in a healthy way.